Submission

In BDSM a bottom or submissive is the partner in a BDSM relationship or a BDSM scene who takes the passive, receiving, or obedient role, to that of the top or the dominant.They assume their subordinate role in private and enjoy the fantasy of having no personal authority and being controlled and dominated with their agreement and collusion.

Submission needs the personal ego of the sub is set aside so that their primary concern is always praising, worshipping and servicing the individual that represents their superior in every way. The main purpose of the sub is to do precisely what he or she is told to do by a dominant, whether it’s online or in person.

There could be tasks to be performed by the submissive outside of the controlled and controlling environment of their BDSM relationship that enhance the connection.The dominant can give the submissive permission to break his or her daily routines by acting in counter-intuitive ways in front of friends, family and work colleagues. The dominant must be kept in mind at all times if this happens.

Subs dream of a reward for their successful service but they usually find that a harsh penalty for their failure to impress can be equally significant and just as pleasurable for them.

    Online BDSM Dating

    It seemed clear that only way to overcome this rejection was to try BDSM dating only and connect with someone based on sexual tastes instead. A place where there would be no moral judgement or unrealistic expectations. He did just that and he had to think of a kinky nickname that reflected his dominant desires. The irony was, that he actually had no experience apart from watching kinky videos and listening to my stories.

    Ode to the Original Mr Grey

    Ode to the Original Mr Grey I’ve always believed that the success of the Fifty Shades of Grey books can be attributed to the character of Christian Grey. For me the the appeal of the trilogy is less about the BDSM and more about the rehearsal of an established female fantasy: a fabulously wealthy, enigmatic older man finding redemption from his past misdemeanours by falling in love with a much younger, poorer and virginal girl. In other words, Fifty Shades of Grey is like a Mills & Boon romance novel with butt-plugs and bondage tape. Anastasia Steel is the lucky girl that women across the world love to identify with. We all desire attention and the arousing prospect of a ripped billionaire choosing us above all others to lavish his attentions and perversions upon was guaranteed to get us wet. Even though he seemed like a stalker sometimes. My personal investment in the allure of Mr Grey fell sharply when Jamie Dornan was cast to play him in the film adaptation of the first book in the trilogy. Although Mr Dornan is a talented actor, serious eye-candy and seems shy in interviews there is a problem. The lack of sexual chemistry between himself and Dakota Johnson, playing Anastasia, killed the fantasy on film for me. Christian will never be my idolised Mr Grey. There is another Mr Grey who makes my pulse race. I’m referring to E. Edward Grey, the protagonist, from the film Secretary as played by the wonderful […]

    CFNM vs CMNF (Femdom)

    When I came across the acronym CFNM on Twitter recently associated with Femdom (Female Domination), I was instantly curious to find out what it meant. I was surprised to learn that in actual fact, the philosophy behind  CFNM (Clothed Female Naked Male) was not news to me at all. As it turns out, I have been practising my own variant of it for years but I have to acknowledge that when I am faced with a choice between CFNM, and its flip side CMNF (Clothed Male Naked Female) I will invariably choose the latter option. One of my favourite things about the nature of fetishism is that almost any kink has a name. To determine one fetish from another, however, the correct designation becomes necessary. My understanding of  CFNM “Clothed Female/Naked Male” is based on my interest and practice of FemDom or Female Domination. The fetishistic value of a CFNM scenario lies in the asymmetrical power relationship of its participants to the way in which they are dressed. A fully dressed woman, or group of women, can be placed in direct fetishistic contrast to a naked man, or group of men. Nakedness often compels vulnerability, reticence and shame when the other member, or members of a scene are dressed and have the dominant role. A CFNM scenario can explore sexual or non-sexual practices, male submission fantasies and/or elements of male display, performance or exhibitionism. Female domination becomes a natural extension of these forms of gender identity roleplaying. In contrast, CMNF […]

    Fifty Shades of Grey: You’ve read the book, seen the trailer, now what?

    Fifty Shades of Grey is trending again and it feels as though it never went away. The truth is, it’s always there now, in the back of our aroused minds. It is, in no small part, the responsibility of its author, E.L. James that 2012 will be remembered as a watershed for erotic literature and the portrayal of BDSM as a viable and peculiarly effective ingredient of modern sexuality. Now, we have seen the first trailer to the forthcoming Fifty Shades of Grey film. Everyone seems to be watching it, talking about it or avoiding it in case it does not live up to their private visualisation of the two main characters involved. Nevertheless, everyone will have to wait until Valentine’s Day 2015 to see it… If the length of the wait seems like a special type of torture then do not get overly concerned. Fifty Shades of Grey is all about BDSM. The punishing delay until fans of the books can see the film seems quite appropriate when you look at it from that perspective. If you need to keep yourself and your own personal Mr Grey distracted and entertained while you are both waiting patiently, then I can think of no better way than to take full advantage of the official Fifty Shades of Grey sex toy collection. The amazing variety of products it comprises will guarantee that neither of you will ever get bored. The collection includes toys such as vibrators, ben wah balls, G spot vibrator, […]

    Cyberslave: My New Short Film

    Cyberslave is a short film that tells the story of a struggling dominatrix and her relationship with Slave X. It explores the dynamics of a D/s relationship, Financial Domination, virtual relationships, during the current economic crisis.. …. But who is the slave? This is the first time I have taken to scriptwriting, I hope you enjoy it! I have always questioned the power dynamics in a D/s relationship when there is money involved. I’ve always believed that the person who pays is the one in charge. Especially if the money is used for everyday living costs, and therefore the dominatrix relies on her slaves’ contributions to live. This calls into question who really has the power. In Cyberslave I wanted to explore the how a financial domme tries to maintain control of her slave and herself, despite her total lack of control over her own situation. Written by and Starring Venus O’Hara Directed by Antón González and Vicente González Make-up and Art Direction: Mariam Elazzouzi Produced by La Isla

    The Power of Orgasm Denial

    Orgasm denial is the best way to deal with rebellious slaves. If a dominant is clever then there are wonderful ways to make someone suffer without physical pain ever being needed. O.D. is still the most satisfying option available to me. I went to Ikea one afternoon to have a look around and investigate the latest range of headboards. I never know when I’m going to need a really strong one so its best to do some research. I walked around the bedding area and felt a little bored to tell the truth. The typical crowds you find in that place were beginning to irritate me with their docile browsing. On a whim, I decided that it was time to end my slave’s period of Orgasm Denial in spectacular fashion right then and there. He had been placed on it for six days and was really starting to suffer. It was great. I sent him an SMS with the codeword “Now”. He understood the rules perfectly. No matter where he was, no matter what he was doing, he had to masturbate immediately. I stood aside from the crowd and, almost at once, he called me back. I heard his belt buckle hit the floor closely followed by his trousers and underwear. He carried lube around with him just in case. I heard the slaps and squelches as he got to work on himself. As I smiled to the husbands and wives as they shuffled past me I listened to the […]

    A Beginner’s Guide to BDSM

    Introducing a little BDSM into your relationship can be a really great way to intensify things, learn your limits and become closer to your partner, but it can also be really intimidating–especially if you’ve never dabbled in it before. Perhaps you’ve been kicking around this site for awhile or you just stumbled here after wondering what BDSM was really like, either way, you’re not alone if you’re worried. Beginning a BDSM adventure can be exciting, but it’s going to take communication, honesty, and an open mind. Use this as your beginners guide and then continue to physically and intellectually explore your options. Communication Communication is key to having a successful and pleasurable BDSM relationship. You can’t dive in without discussing the semantics, rules, limits, and safe words. Make sure your partner has a full understanding of what BDSM will entail, what the different roles (dom/sub) mean and who will be who. It won’t work if you both want to be the sub or vice versa. You will also need to discuss what your limits will be. Are you okay with anal play? Paddling? What level of pain or loss of control are you willing to go to? You want to make sure you are both on the same page. It’s fun to push limits, but you don’t want to push them so far that it becomes scary or someone gets hurt. The best way to ensure no one gets hurt is to set up a safe word that you can […]

    Blindfold Fantasies

    It was just recently that a good friend made an observation about my fetish for blindfolds. “It seems as though the main reason you wear blindfolds is so that you don’t have to see the men that you sleep with” She said. I agreed that sometimes it was true, but that it wasn’t always that simple. Since that night, I’ve been thinking about blindfolds a lot. When my eyes disappear behind one, it isn’t just my ability to see that’s affected. With my eyes covered, I can immerse myself in a private fantasy world. A simple touch suddenly means so much more. What seems like just a relaxing caress from fingers I can see becomes thrilling and charged with excitement when it involves ones that I can’t. It’s impossible to anticipate their intention or predict their next movement when I’m behind the blindfold. I don’t need to think at all. I can be perfectly selfish and deliciously passive for a change. [nggallery id=62] Photos by Yuky Lutz

    50 shades of Venus

    In case you hadn’t realised, Planet Venus is back. It may seem perverse for me to be away from my regular writing responsibilities at this time. BDSM has suddenly become the literary flavour of the year with the publishing phenomenon of “50 Shades of Grey” taking the mainstream reading habits of the world by storm. In this eroticized and aroused moment in time you might think that I’ve been neglecting my proper duties and the philosophy behind my all important web. Although my loyal slaves have been working around the clock, they can only achieve so much on their own before I have to take the initiative again and do the things for Planet Venus that only I am qualified to do. Nevertheless, I see the distinctive cover of “50 Shades of Grey” and its sequels appearing in increasing numbers on the metro, in cafes and being read on benches in municipal parks. Everyone has either read it, is reading it or feels that they need to have an opinion about it. In my mind this can only be a good thing. It is still only fiction however. What happens when all of those readers feel the need to experiment with BDSM in their real lives? If you really want to discover how fulfilling and exciting BDSM can be but you are reluctant to do so because of any pre-conceptions you might still have then let me reassure you. BDSM can be so much fun that it’s almost a scandal […]

    Feminism Vs Femdom

    Feminism has got a bad name over the years for a variety of reasons. Mostly, in our hypersexual culture of eroticised imagery, it commits the cardinal sin of being a little unsexy. Feminism began as a movement based on the establishment of equality between the sexes. It has gone through many distinct phases since its beginnings and not all of them have been comfortable. At first, feminists wanted to be taken as seriously as men. To achieve their aim, they thought that they had to act just like men. Unfortunately, for some, that meant dressing like them as well. Thank God for the Spice Girls. The five of them turned up in short skirts and taught us about “girl power”. They were proof that you can wear high heels and still be a feminist. I defined myself as a feminist until I discovered  Femdom (Female Domination). Femdom usually describes the power structure of a BDSM relationship in which the dominant partner is exclusively female. As a result of her complete authority over her submissive partner, she determines the activities that define their relationship. This includes any and all of the rules and punishments that exist during those sessions. Feminism, in its early stages, tried to do without femininity and looked down on it to some extent. Femdom doesn’t just accept femininity it takes it to another level. Female charms are emphasised and exploited like sexual weapons. Feminists believe that if you show too much cleavage you’ll never be taken seriously. […]

    BDSM for Beginners – Terminology

    BDSM is a perfect festive treat for the Christmas holidays. That’s fine if you know what you’re doing. You might be new to BDSM. You and your partner might still want to use your time off together to try it out anyway. Here are my 10 Basic BDSM Terms for Beginners. BDSM stands for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism. DOMINANT (also dom, domme): the one in charge. SUBMISSIVE (also sub) the one who gives themselves freely for the pleasure of another. SWITCH an individual who “switches” between dominant and submissive roles. A switch can be both a sadist and a masochist. VANILLA refers to non-BDSM sex, “vanilla sex”.A person who doesn’t do BDSM is a “vanilla” SUBMISSION CONTRACT a formal document that defines the relationship of a sub to his or her domme. A contract might describe sexual arrangements, rules and punishment, as well as defining day to day duties. SAFEWORD a word or phrase used to stop a BDSM game. Safewords are defined beforehand and should be respected by the dominant> A common safe word is “red” (stop) or “yellow” (approaching the limit). Photo by Guy Moberly from Love Me Like You Hate Me. BONDAGE the practice of restricting a person’s bodily movements for erotic pleasure. FETISH a “fetish” is an object, non-reproductive body part or action whose presence or existence causes excitement and/or arousal in an individual. An object might be latex or heels, a non-sexual body part could be legs or feet and […]

    How To Be A Good Slave

    Being a good slave is not easy. Even the best ones slip up sometimes and make mistakes – sometimes intentionally. For the first – and last – time, here are my ten slave commandments. They need to be followed if you ever want to be a good slave yourself. 1. Understand that your Goddess is always right. She should never be questioned or contradicted in any way. 2. A good slave should be available to serve at all times, even when his Goddess is asleep. 3. All of your disposable income should be available for your Goddess to use in whichever way She sees fit. 4. Never – ever – complain. Just shut up and just serve, serve, serve. 5. Always do more for your Goddess than what is expected of you. This might impress Her enough for you to earn privileges. 6. Always listen closely to details and never get important facts wrong. 7.Worship your goddess and realise how lucky you are to be near such a unique creature. 8.Never make demands on your Goddess. Anything you receive from Her is a gift. 9.A good slave never shows any signs of free will. 10.Never threaten your Goddess with the termination of your worship. This is the worst of all possible slave-crimes. As a natural switch I occasionally enjoy playing around with the role of a passive sub instead of my preferred domme status. When I slid down onto my knees and assumed a classic sub pose I was always […]

    The Myth of Financial Domination

    In BDSM, financial domination is a situation where a female dominant has complete control over the disposable income of Her submissive slave. For her instant gratification, she would also expect gifts whenever she felt like it. A financial slave only works and earns so that he can please his adored dominant female. This means that he supplies constant financial support to Her and that he pays instant monetary penalties whenever She demands them. A key part of financial domination is the slave’s acceptance that he should only live on the cheapest groceries available so that his Goddess can enjoy more luxuries at his expense. To permit his domme to live like the Goddess that he knows She is, a good slave will make any sacrifice and – more importantly – take huge fetishistic pleasure in doing so. He expects nothing in return except the continued honour of serving Her. When viewed in these terms it seems as though the domme has complete financial control but – in reality – the scenario is much more complicated. I am convinced that, in any situation, the customer is always right. The person with the money is the one with the real power in a BDSM relationship as in any other. This conclusion is at odds with the accepted definition of financial domination. There is no such thing as a free lunch and a domme understands this all too well. The world of BDSM does not have a trade union or social security and […]

    Black Lace Blindfold

    Many fetishists think that lace blindfolds are a bit pointless. After all, a blindfold should restrict vision and deprive the wearer of vital sensory information – not allow them to see their master/mistress whenever they choose. As far as I’m concerned there’s only one drawback with black lace blindfolds and that’s the number of people who just can’t see their obvious fetish potential.When I wore the black lace blindfold – that you see in these images – I felt dominant in front of the photographer, not submissive as I might have anticipated. When I wear sunglasses I can see perfectly but the person I’m talking to can feel uncomfortable and anxious because the eye-contact between us has been disrupted – wilfully, – by my choice of eyewear. My feelings, responses and thoughts – usually so easy to read in my huge, expressive, eyes can no longer be interpreted or relied upon. Lace blindfolds serve the same function in BDSM roleplay. This accessory is unique in the grey area it occupies between submissive blindfolds and dominant masks. If you want to be submissive in a lace blindfold, all you need to do is close your eyes and adopt that persona. If you want to be dominant, just keep your eyes open and use the confusing filter of the black lace to intimidate your slave further by staring at them through it. They won’t know how to respond, trust me. During the shoot I wasn’t able to express myself with my eyes […]

    Exploring Hood Fetish

    A hood can be worn and exploited by both dominants and submissives. I’d wanted to explore the idea of a hood fetish photo-set that played with the idea of power and anonymity for a while. When I opened the box that this little scrap of stretchy black lace was packed in, I didn’t realise at first how much BDSM potential it had – I was excited at how provocative and mysterious I’d look just by putting it on. A fitted hood with openings just for the mouth and eyes – when worn by dominating women – exaggerates their fetish identity. Although it hides characteristics like hair, chin-line and ears under its surface, a hood still defines the shape of the head and allows the exposed features to have overwhelming importance. I only increased this effect on myself by emphasising my green eyes with a similar shade of make-up and by plumping and exaggerating my pout with glistening red lipstick. The power of the hood fetish isn’t just for dominant’s though and it’s possible to adapt that BDSM persona into a submissive one just by changing your expression a little bit. Fetish hoods like this are perfect for switches who are clever enough to keep their role-play partners guessing. This was my first fetish hood set and the sensations I felt were intense. It was a real challenge to pose without being able to show off my long red hair and use it as a fetish prop. With my secret – […]

    Suspension

    Suspension bondage appeals to fetishists because it makes the person being suspended seem more vulnerable if they are unable and unwilling to escape their restraints. By trying to free themselves they could fall to the floor and injure themselves so their anxiety is magnified. Being suspended in a large open space also turns a helpless, submissive subject into an object whose complete powerlessness can be as erotically satisfying for themselves as much as for any spectators watching. Rope suspension can be a form of performance art at BDSM conventions and fetish-themed nightclubs. I was fascinated by the suspension shows I saw at some of those clubs. I prefer pain-free suspension rather than the kind that uses hook and chains.It was on Bogatell beach in Barcelona where I saw a rope climbing frame and thought I’d try suspension for myself Even though high-heels aren’t recommended to wear on rope climbing frames they were perfect with my matching black boy-shorts, transparent long-sleeved top and hold-up stockings which emphasised my pure-white, naked thighs for all those appreciative fetishists out there. It was a real challenge hanging up there with my fiery red hair hanging down and blowing in the warm breeze. I had to rely upon my strength alone to support my body but I was more than up for the challenge I had set for myself. I knew that some spectators were taking photos of me hanging there but – just to show my playful awareness of them – I posed at […]

    Slave Duties for Rebellious Subs

    Cleaning can be the most valuable of slave duties that can be given out as a punishment. It can be repetitive and demeaning but it always gets something done that a dominatrix would never choose to do herself. The pleasure in watching someone else scrub, polish and tidy is increased by making them wear suitable clothing. This set was intended to illustrate the “Masters and Slaves” section of my book Love Me Like You Hate Me, so I I made a special point of wearing a collar that reminded me of my slave status in the scenario. It also played against my wild, red hair and glossy, lipsticked pout. I was aware of how fetishistic the heavy, rubber gloves made even my most ordinary movements seem. It was easy to play against the slave image and the the photographer noticed too. I was reminded of his lowly position when he took the photos as I was standing in a bathtub, above him and I felt anything but submissive in his presence. It became total role-play and I indulged myself in the moment at his expense. I’m a cleaning fetishist through and through and I adored this session despite, or because of, my naturally messy nature. [nggallery id=6] Photos by Guy Moberly.

    Venus in Furs – My Favourite Book

    Venus in Furs by Leopold von Sacher-Masoch is my favourite book. An influential lover gave it to me as an instruction manual, to educate me, years ago when I was a student. The word masochism derives not just from the author of the book but from the nature of the story itself. Masochism has come to mean the tendency to derive pleasure from one’s own pain and humiliation. Venus in Furs tells the story of Severin, a man who is so infatuated with a young widow, Wanda von Dunajew, that he requests to be her slave. For Severin, Wanda is Venus-a redhead with green eyes and porcelain white skin. Naturally I identified with her. The following is an extract from the text: “She is there-Venus-but without furs-No, this time it is merely the widow-and yet-Venus-oh, what a woman!” “As she stands there in her light white morning gown, looking at me, her slight figure seems full of poetry and grace. She is neither large, nor small; her head is alluring, piquant-in the sense of the period of the French marquises-rather than formally beautiful. What enchantment and softness, what roguish charm plays about her none too small mouth! Her skin is so infinitely delicate, that the blue veins show through everywhere; even through the muslin covering her arms and bosom. How abundant her red hair-it is red, not blonde or golden-yellow-how diabolically and yet tenderly it plays around her neck! Now her eyes meet mine like green lightnings-they are green, these […]

    My First Book: Love Me Like You Hate Me – Venus O’Hara

    In this era of 24/7 social networking, anyone can call themselves a writer because their words can be published online whenever they feel like it. I’ve always had plenty to say and my free website was the first ongoing outlet for my views and opinions. At the start, writing my posts was something fun I did on a Sunday afternoon; it was a hobby. Within three months though, I had an offer to co-author a book with Erika Lust and, suddenly, my hobby had to be taken a lot more seriously. The masochist in me enjoyed the unhelpful conditions I suffered to complete the project. For example, I always sat in the same old vintage leather chair-featured in many of my photo-sets-to get the work done. I wore old jogging bottoms, an ancient hoodie and, as it was during the winter months, I was usually wrapped up in a blanket that my grandma had sent to me; it had kept generations of O’Haras warm and I was very glad to have it. The door to my balcony was broken and no matter how much furniture I piled up against it, I still heard the rattle as it let in another bitter draft of cold air. My fingers were frozen and I could see my breath as I typed, busily, on the keyboard of my tired, unreliable laptop. I’ve got a new one now, thank God. I knew, even then, that I would look back at the hardship of the writing […]

    Types of Submission – Venus O’Hara

    In BDSM a bottom or submissive is the partner in a BDSM relationship or a BDSM scene who takes the passive, receiving, or obedient role, to that of the top or the dominant. Many submissives are high-flying professional males seeking escape from their almost overwhelming responsibilities and their power to determine the fates of their employees in public. They do this by assuming their subordinate role in private and by enjoying the fantasy of having no personal authority; by being controlled and dominated themselves. In reality, submissives tend to be people with profound intellectual and emotional depth whose sensitivities are beyond the ability of modern media or popular culture to accommodate or value. They find satisfaction by submitting themselves to someone else whose intelligence and honesty they trust above all others; someone they believe to be worthy of their worship. For some, submission means being able to recognise the greatness of a dominant by kneeling before them. In the case of male subsmissives, the act of worshipping a strong woman is contrary to religious tradition, education and nature. In the case of a female submissive, her enjoyment in complying to the whims of a dominant male seems to contradict the hard-won achievements of feminism. In reality, however, neither individual is betraying their respective genders but are, instead, choosing to dismantle their own social programming in private to define their own identity and power more fully. There are three defining principles to the submissives vital connection to his or her dominant: […]

    Love Me Like You Hate Me – Teaser

    I recently made my acting debut in the acclaimed short film “Love Me Like You Hate Me”, written and directed by Erika Lust, (Lust Films 2010). It is an arousing exploration of the seductive thrills of domination and the fear and excitement of submission in which I play seven characters. Now, the film has been re-edited, re-scored and re-imagined to further emphasise its unusual ability to disturb and excite with its lurid and fetishistic imagery of domestic servitude, confinement and spanking, gloves fetish, glasses fetish, wet clothes fetish and much more. In its new form it has become an unusually kinetic and intense type of BDSM thriller which restores footage-previously regarded as too intense-of me bound hand and foot and constrained by a ball-gag, to its list of astounding highlights. I’m still shocked at how effective the following teaser is and I can hardly wait to see the more provocative cut of the film when it debuts soon. Photo above by Kristyan Geyr Images TEASER LOVE ME LIKE YOU HATE ME Cargado por lustfilms. – Mira más videos de TV y películas.

    Behind Bars – Cage Fetish

    When an exotic creature is kept imprisoned behind bars it is the interested spectators inability to look away from it that determines the length of its confinement. There is dreadful pleasure in seeing a beautiful beast trapped in a cage; some imported animals are powerful and dangerous and we need to be protected from their unusual powers as we become voyeurs.When it’s a fetish model gripping those bars and looking back at us our pulses quicken with a presence that is awe-inspiring and sublime.The goddess in a cage reminds us of that part of ourselves that we are urged to keep under lock and key except when it’s safe not to. I had no real intention of shooting an impromptu set of images on that day until I saw the metal bars in the grounds of my friends home. I pictured myself as a prisoner of sensual conscience kept isolated from the vanilla public for their own protection but inspiring awe and devotion in growing rows of visitors to my fetish cell. If you look closely, between the bars, you’ll find me staring back. So, look away; I dare you. Photos taken by Lars Koudal.  Lars has also been helping me with my web and he’s been fantastic. Enjoy the set!   Venus O’Hara

    No Pain, No Gain (BDSM)

    Pain has always been a part of accepted behaviour in conventional sexual relationships. The loss of control that defines the act itself anticipates scratching and hair pulling; love bites are a more obvious reminder of recent pleasures.These “in the moment” expressions of passion are intuitive and spontaneous. The application of pain when associated with BDSM is different, it is methodical and organised for a specific purpose; it refines the production of pleasure by the exploitation of its polar opposite. There are many intelligent applications of pain in the world of BDSM, enough to sharpen appetites that are subtle or broad. Spanking is an arousing interplay of punishment and sensuality, randomness and design.Whipping is a more direct approach to the use of formal chastisement without sweetness to balance it. Temperature play tests our reactions to heat and cold to enhance sensation to a much greater degree. Even rope burns from shibari bondage can have an appeal all of their own.The list goes on and on. To read a lot more about the uses and value of pain in the search for greater pleasures and to enjoy more images from this set, please refer to LOVE ME LIKE YOU HATE ME, my forthcoming book about BDSM written with Erika Lust and due for publication in Autumn 2010. Photos by David Vega.   Enjoy! Venus O’Hara

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