I could never truly appreciate how much physical effort a man puts in to having sex until I had experienced strap-on sex. I wonder if this is the reason why few women are really committed to having strap-on sex. There is another explanation for this. A woman who has to wear a harness, just so that she can use a dildo on another woman, might not enjoy playing such a traditionally masculine role in bed. I have to admit that I prefer to be on the receiving end in strap-on sex. This is especially true when I imagine a female lover who can offer me a penis that is permanently hard as well as a pair of breasts simultaneously.

Strap-on Venus O'Hara by Lourdes Ribas-0007

That is the fantasy scenario that attracts me.

The reality of strap-on sex can be a little different.

It is still a challenge to find a good quality harness matched up to a suitable dildo. Harnesses can be difficult to put on and to wear for any length of time without rubbing against the skin. I also find that unsecured dildos slide around too much and are far too large for any sustained use. From a practical point of view, the shaft is also positioned a lot higher than it would be with a real man. Anyway, if I have to walk around a room with a long length of stiff silicon bouncing up and down between my legs I can not be blamed if I start laughing about it.

Strap-on Venus O'Hara by Lourdes Ribas-0010

If I’m going to play the girl in strap-on sex then I always insist that my lover puts a condom on the dildo that she is going to put inside me. Some lesbians wonder what difference that makes. I don’t trust the material that dildos are made of and that goes for every other sex toy as well. Condoms guarantee a high level of cleanliness and that simple fact is important to me, particularly if toys are going to be shared.

Strap-on sex can be great fun, but the truth is that there is nothing like the real thing.

Strap-on Venus O'Hara by Lourdes Ribas-0014

Photos by Lourdes Ribas.

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