Some people seem to think that my life must be scandalous. This might be because I write articles about sex. It could be something to do with my habit of being wired-up, from time to time, as a test-subject for scientific sex experiments. It might be because I appeared nude on the cover of Interviu magazine, or even as a result of my side-career testing sex toys for money. I do not believe that anything related to these exploits is truly scandalous however.

In my opinion, aspects of my previous, conventional, jobs exposed me to far more scandal than anything I could ever be responsible for.
Rollers Venus O'Hara by Lourdes Ribas-0000The thing I found the most scandalous about my past jobs was being expected to lie while I was in contact with a customer or a client. I never did, of course. Even if my manager told me to. I was always on the side of the buyer. If I had made promises to a customer then I was going to make sure that we, as a company, fulfilled those promises. Sometimes this meant whipping my colleagues into shape so they did their job.

When I worked in luxury real estate, the scandal was even worse. The whole business was based on lies. The property descriptions, the photographs, the prices, the offers… all of it was exaggerated or made up. The worst thing of all was when a client made an offer and there was no counter-bid. In that case, I was expected to lie about one so that the buyer would have to raise their offer.

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My conscience made it impossible for me to do this and I always refused. There were times when I knew, for a fact, that the only funds that a buyer had available to them were their life savings. If I lied to them, just to get more money, then the guilt would have stayed with me. Perhaps that is the result of my Catholic upbringing. I wonder how other real estate agents handle their professional scandals?
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Private scandals are no different, not really. Sometimes the effort and planning it takes to hide spontaneous indiscretions or maintain longer term infidelities amazes me. It is choosing to live a life that includes a permanent percentage of scandalous sexual behaviour that never fails to fascinate. People who lead a double life, and who want to admit it anonymously, is my favourite subject of study. It was why I created the online confessional forum No sabes con quien duermes.

When I take into consideration all the lies that people live, whether in their working life or in their private ones, I realise that my life is not scandalous at all.

Photos by Lourdes Ribas.

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